A bit of a ruckus here in Charlotte.  The woman that had an extramarital affair with General Petraus lives in town & the FBI paid her a visit last night.   John Stewart sums it up.......

It Happened in Flor-I-Duh: Guy steals delivery car and continues to deliver Chinese food to customers.

Man tries to shoplift Pop Tarts and a Slim Jim by putting items in the back of his girlfriend's pants.

Woman runs over husband with a Jeep because he didn't vote.

Craigslist Price Is Right:  Doggie Panties...never used.  

240 "Fart Fans"  New in box.

Female wanted for "ball busting"  Will pay $20 an hour.

"Storm Porn" is a thing. 

So THIS happened.  Woody explains.

Lots of different businesses have "codes" for things.  For instance, at a theme park close to Charlotte they use the term "protein spill" in place of saying someone puking.  We took your calls and LOTS of places have code words....some disturbing....

There's some kinda love thing going on with high ranking gov't officials and Elmo.  No...wait.  It's a ruckus. More here.

New names for DZL's band today:  "Protein Spill", "Love Rectangle" and "Clam Nursery"